Disclaimer: This is all satire. No claims are real. Just dangerously good fun. Eat responsibly. Rebel wisely.
Proceed with caution, or don’t. We won't judge.
Harambe Chipotle – Smoke Signals from a Fallen Legend
This is not a “nice little Chipotle drizzle.” This is hot sauce built to haunt your grill.
Harambe Chipotle comes in swinging with a sharp distilled vinegar snap, then drags you straight into the smoke pit with red chipotle and smoked red jalapeño pepper mash. Think slow-burning campfire in flavor form: deep, earthy, and properly roasted, with just enough heat to remind you you’re alive without turning dinner into a dare.
Granulated garlic and onion load it up with savory umami, while the spice blend and caramel color lock it into that rich, dark, brick-red hue that looks like it belongs on literally everything. Silky, so it grips your tacos, fries, wings, and breakfast burritos like they’re trying to escape extinction.
This is a flavor-first hot sauce: smoky, tangy, and steady-warm. Not a stunt, not a challenge. Just dangerously crushable heat.
Flavor Profile (Hot Sauce Edition):
Base: Bright vinegar tang to cut through rich, fatty foods
Heat: Smoked red jalapeño & chipotle warmth (not face-melting)
Vibe: Campfire smoke, grilled pepper skins, roasted garlic
Texture: Smooth, clingy drip that coats every bite
Best Deployment: Tacos, burgers, grilled corn, huevos rancheros, mac & cheese, veggie bowls, pizza, and anything that deserves a smoky tribute from the gorilla gods.
Heat level: 🔥 (1/5)
Warm glow, all-day pour. This is your “put it on everything” smoky hot sauce.
Ingredients: Distilled Vinegar, Red Chipotle, Pepper Mash (Smoked Red Jalapeno, Peppers, Water, Salt), Xanthan Gum, Granulated Garlic, Granulated Onion, Sodium Benzoate, Spices, Caramel Color.
Refrigerate After Opening.
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